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The angel in charge of these things told him, “Because you were an unbeliever and a doubter and a skeptic, you will be sent to Hell for all eternity -- which, in your case, consists of a place where no one will disagree with you ever again!”A visitor to a Unitarian Universalist church sat through the sermon with growing incredulity at the heretical ideas being spouted. After the sermon a UU asked the visitor, “So how did you like it?”“I can’t believe half the things that minister said!” sputtered the visitor in outrage.“Oh, good -- then you’ll fit right in!”For Jews, the deity is YHWH. For UU’s, it’s YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary).There was a terrible car accident. A woman was lying in the street, covered in blood. Someone in the crowd shouted, “Call a priest!”The woman opened her eyes and said, “I’m a Unitarian.”“Then call a math teacher!”HOW MANY (xxxxxx) DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?Anglicans: 8. One to call the electrician and 7 to say how much they liked the old one. She hated his tone, his subtle hints. Couldn’t a woman be more than a pair of walking breasts? It was then that Fabian realized that the woman didn’t like him. Shocked to the edges of his heart, he made himself look away from her perfectly sculpted face and concentrate on the task of assigning her a room- a task he could’ve done in his sleep. He was deeply hurt for some peculiar reason and could not fathom why the woman didn’t take to him. He recognized disinterest when he saw it. Fabian had to walk her to her room, duffel bag in one hand. It was two in the morning and he had told the porters who worked for him to head off to bed. His ego was bruised and his mood was sour. So what if this woman didn’t like him? She was nothing special anyway. At least, that’s what he made himself believe. Sarah heard the door close softly behind her. Truth to tell, she was surprised. She had almost convinced herself that he would make an advance. It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him to fuck.
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